Are YOU ready to join the army?

Obsessed? I think not.

So as most (or the two of you who actually read this blog) of you know, I like to sew. In fact, I've been making bags and selling them at local boutiques for the past several months. Needless to say, I've got loads of fabric. In fact, when I move, my fabric takes up more space than my clothes. Anyway, I realized the other night that I really need to start setting my priorities straight when I had a nightmare involving my fabric.

I dreamt that I was housesitting for someone and when I came inside the house, there was a man waiting for me with a knife. He held me at knifepoint and told me that he needed money. Instead of asking me for money (perhaps he knew that I didn't have any), he made me cut all my fabric up into 1-ft squares so he could sell the pieces on ebay. I was so distraught in my dream--not because I had a knife to my throat but because I would not be able to make anything out of such a small piece of fabric.

I need a life.

This is what had me...

I hadnt read any Strongbad Emails lately, so Im feeling reminicent. This is the email that had me hooked...

Money changers in the temple...I kid you not.

So on Thursday nights, I work in the Salt Lake Temple cafeteria serving food. Tonight, I'm cleaning up and I see this sweet old temple worker leaving and I make polite small talk. He tells me that he's never seen me before, I let him know that I've been there about six months, and he says how happy he is to see me at the temple. Anxious to get going, I make a polite comment about him having a little snack in the cafeteria before his last session and he lights up and he asks, "Do you feel that you have enough energy?"
Confused and leary, I answer that I'm sure that I could always use more. He then asks me what I eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and I sheepishly make something up (sorry for lying in the temple, but I'm pretty embarrassed by my poor diet). He then pulls out a bottle of Full Energy Inulin and proceeds to tell me what a difference it makes for him in his energy levels. From his pocket, he pulls a plastic spoon out of a baggie and asks if I'd like to taste it and so I do and politely say how good it tastes. Long story short, he asks me if I'd like to try some. I hem and haw and ask how much, and he says, "only 41.99 for a 1 pound bottle." Before I can think of an excuse to hightail it outta there, he says, "stay right there, I'll be right back." He is gone for a few minutes and I consider slipping out, but remember that I'm in the temple and I'll have to see this good brother every Thursday, so I stay. He comes back with a BRIEFCASE full of this stuff, and shows me a very small $41.99 bottle of Inulin (which, FYI, on the website is $39.99). I tell him that I am a poor teacher and cannot afford such goods, so he gives me a gift of a sample size of the following: Silver, sugar-free nutritive bullets made with 100% Inulin
Apparently, I'm supposed to take one of these 15 minutes before running and any other time I need a boost. My question, what is Inulin? To me, it sounds a bit like Insulin, and that's not good.

Anyway, sweet old man. I'm not interested. When I got home, I looked at the bottle closer, and this "miracle pill" is bottled in Holladay, Utah, and the sweet brother's name was Brother Silver.